Sacred Font (for mom)

Words elude as I try to pry them
Loose-from mind’s wall,  stream-
Lining them for a justifiable fit

Reverence mingles as tears well for a soul
That was so gentle and loving, a mighty
Heart that touched countless many

A mother of three yet unworldly, innocent
Gullible to a fault, often taken for a ride
By smooth talking strangers, friends

Nothing sullied her faith in human goodness
She believed in sharing whatever she had freely
With whosoever knocked on our door~ daily, nightly

Implicit faith made her tiny stature seem tall, she only
Wore immaculate starched white saris and unabashedly
Sang in gatherings-rather out of tune, her voice quivering

Folks smiled and let her be without saying a word
Making us feel as if she was their beloved child and
Not their friend or neighbor~ such was her sacred aura

Our rebellious ways she controlled with welling
Eyes making us feel like heels and quickly we caved
Behaving just as she expected without letting her down

Afflicted early in life, she managed herself with dignity
Never weeping or giving in, always carrying herself
With infinite grace and courage living life on own terms

Once due to cancelled trains I was helplessly caught in a human
Stampede, her non-stop prayers brought me home unharmed with not
A single hair out of place, nor any body part broken, miraculously

One day she decided to call it quits and gave up on life
The malady she had beaten returned after a score of years
Not prepared to suffer once again, she chose to live no more

Willing herself to die- she let go of her life surrounded by
All her friends, distant and close kin –after seeking forgiveness
From each and everyone thus reconciling her ledger of life

The night vigil is one I will remember to my dying day, as we bid
Godspeed to her departing soul –the image of her deity became her face
As wonderstruck we beheld this sight, happy she was finally home

Unfettered
~

Barred
Sentenced
… To drudgery
of another’s
Choice, soul
Thrashed about
Heart fluttered
Begged
Respite

Days
And nights
haze of
dazed
shadowy
Bars
black
white

childhood
conditioning
came
to rescue
began
talking
to a thimble
sized statue

day in
day out
this one-sided
talk continued
until one day
the statue
answered
back~

~

You Linger

You had crossed
Over and we had
Dutifully given
A grand sendoff
Amidst flowers
Mantra chants
Fragrant pyre
Of sandalwood
Bier of your favorite
Flowers and things

Ashes and bones
Fire purified, lovingly
Immersed in holy Ganges
Shradh* ceremony
To appease preceded
Performed to ease
Your onward journey
So~Why~Did~You
Return?

Linger ~thus~ Scaring children
Grandchildren ~ who loved you so
When you wore a human form
Of flesh and bone?

You linger bodiless
Transparent ~ethereal
flowing filling spaces
Like air jet stream disturbing
Aura, dust and light motes
Turning darkness~ dank musky

What is remiss
do you miss us
or have we missed
something? Do indicate
So we can make amends
And Bid you a final adieu

You linger
but since
I love you
So- do go
Gently into
Night in peace
And harmony

~

*Sanskrit ?r?ddha, also spelled Shraddha, in Hinduism, is a ceremony performed in honor of a dead ancestor.  The rite is both a social and a religious responsibility enjoined on all male Hindus. The importance given in India to the birth of sons is to ensure that there will be a male descendant to perform the sraddha ceremony after one’s death.  The rite is performed for deceased father, grandfather, and great-grandfather and also for mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother. It is intended to nourish, protect, and support their spirits.

*picture courtesy Sook Hottle

Fervor

Fervor gets me inside
Inner flame brightens
Recharged
~ ~

Depth

Awash in mantra chants
Buoyant~ plumb depths
Take a dive
~ ~

Death

Sandalwood pallets
Funeral pyre, readied
Set fire to self on daily basis
**  ~ **
PS: all photographs are by Sook Hottle

Ultimate Detachment

Human ash
Smeared body
Ready to be ash

Snake Charmer

Flute sounds reverberate
Flooding inner channels
Coil straightens in ascent

Time

Hourglass sands drip
Relish every grain
Before its trip

**First two photographs are by Sook Hottle

~

Longings and Satiation

Physical emotions
Cravings need satiation

Chocolates flowers
Cut it just so much
Cravings stay

Body pandered to, butterfly
Mind flutters

Tickled by exquisite thoughts
Dressed in fragile words
Mind beamed captivated

Longings of heart, soul
Strings pulled taut
Ache persists

Now I wander meditate
Travel place to place
Delving within without

Man made wonders delight, natural
Wonders salve, I beak on manna
Pearls bestowed from above

Churches temples imposing edifices
Provide solace, but a child’s smile
A hopping bird has its own grace

Infinite wonder of creation, from leaf
To flowers to rivers, mountains waterfalls
My soul’s ultimate symphony, all

~

diminsh

self

fully

immersed

* -*

unloaded

I soar

Enlightened

*-*

such is

love’s math

on two

equals

one

*-*

Yearnings

Salutations

Gratitude

Exhaled

Beseeched

Scrolled

Origami

Folds

Hands

Flags

Beads

 Hoisted

Poles

Pennants

Wheels

Colors

Covey of prayers

Winging upward

Buoyant wishful

Candles

Tapers

Lit votives

Offered intentions

Homage iconic

OmMani Padme Hum

Thought steeds towards

Internal sanctuary

Few avow soul is pure

Fraud, a slot machine

A disconnect from reality

Everyday, I stitch mouths of grief

With laughter cross stitches

Planting rows of smiling beds

Undertow of sadness

Is strong but my will tough

Enough to overcome it

Eyes anointed with holy water

Sight of ecstatic prayer flags against

Distant peaks, chiming monastic bells

All exude strange bliss within me

Reinforcing walls of inner sconce

Receptacle for my soul’s lit flame

As my feet hit ground every morning

I am thankful for his continued grace

Even as I long to opt out of life’s rat race